- Over the years, I have received many calls and handled many situations of singles who were dating people who were pretending in a relationship. Someway somehow, most of them spotted the red flags but they decided to hold on a bit longer hoping that the other party will change but things never got better. The aftermath thereof is a brokenhearted, disappointed, abused and a used person who may be full of bitterness and finding it difficult to forgive and move on in life.
To really understand and know who a pretender is, let us look at a few synonyms of the word pretender.
- Sweet talker
- Role player
Dear Singles, now that you have a fair idea of who a pretender is, know that it is a dangerous thing to marry anyone that pretends. Anyone that pretends is a hypocrite. The only group of people that Jesus Christ constantly criticize and condemned was the Pharisees who acted hypocritically. Now, let us look at the 15 reasons why you must not marry a pretender.
15 Reasons Not To Marry A Pretender
- They are experts at telling lies: Anyone that pretends cannot be truthful.
- They are not reliable: You cannot depend on them and they are never consistent in their decisions and plans with you.
- They are full of excuses: You should always expect a truckload of excuses why they are not on time, why they love you but cannot marry you but won’t let you be in peace and a whole lot of flimsy excuses.
- They cannot be trusted: You never know when their YES means YES and when their NO really means NO.
- They are not real. They are fake and they will continue to live fake lives around you until you show them the exit in your life.
- Time and life wasters: A pretender will waste your time and delay you in life and this will never lead you to the altar to bless your marriage.
- Know what they want: Every pretender is only attached to you because of what they are looking for. Once they get it, they dump you and go for another person they can be real with. To most of them, they are after sex, your money or just enjoying your companionship.
- They have a low commitment to any plans together: They know they will not last in your life so why will they commit themselves into future projects for mutual benefit?
- False hope and expectations: They give you false hope but will let you down when you need them most in life.
- Those relationships and marriages don’t last: The end of your relationship and marital life with a pretender will always crash unless he or she repents and changes the mind.
- They don’t really care about you: They are self-centered. It’s always about them, not you.
- You do not belong to their future: Listen to me, a pretender does not care about your future. They are only interested in their immediate benefit from you.
- Know that you are not their ideal partner: They are just keeping you in the interim while praying and preparing to meet Mr. Right or perhaps, Mrs. Right and thereafter, leave you to be with the person of their dreams.
- Your happiness is sacrificed: It takes two loving hearts that are connected and committed to achieving a particular purpose to make one happy. True happiness is natural but not faked.
- You are never at peace and feel insecure: Do not be blind in life while in love. Enter with your heart but carry your brains along. Love is meant to be enjoyed but not endured. If you do not have a peace of mind about your future with that person then take heed. Your inner peace about the relationship is very important. If it’s missing, then know that you are missing the vital things in life.
Do you have any pretender in your life who wants to marry you? Can you spot the signs of a lover who is a pretender? What do you do when you realize that your partner is a pretender and only deceiving you? Watch out for the next article on how to handle pretending partners.