20 Habits That Destroy Your Relationship & Marriage Faster

Love is a beautiful thing that can ever happen to you when you meet the right person and you guys really know what to do to keep the fire burning and stay happier. A happy relationship and marital life cannot be put on autopilot to survive. You have to work it out. In that same vein, there are some things that if you do not pay attention to them, they will destroy your relationship and marriage faster than you can ever imagine.

In this article, I will throw more light on the 20 habits that destroy your relationship and marriage faster in life. When done reading, kindly add your voice telling us your views and experiences about it.

20 Habits That Destroy Your Relationship Faster

  1. Lack of mutual respect

You cannot live and be happier with someone that does not respect you in life. Human beings are created to be loved, adored, appreciated and honoured. Our mutual existence is only possible when respect and the above are present. Never marry anyone that does not respect you, your values and your family members. You will be in slavery to marry someone who neither respects nor values you as well as your family.

  1. When love is missing

The only reason for which you will agree to date and marry someone is that you love the person and the person too does. You do not have any business in any relationship when love is missing. You are doing yourself more harm than good if you should continue with such a relationship.

In Other Shocking Story: My Sister’s Husband Raped Me

  1. When you talk too much, leak secrets and sensitive issues

I had a difficult time counseling a young man that finds it difficult to keep mute over some sensitive issues in his personal life and that of others. Having realized that he has a psychological problem, I referred him to see a professional psychologist having explained his conditions to him. He admits his problem, that’s not being able to keep secrets of other people and his own secrets. However, he has refused to see a professional for remedial solutions to his problem.

Over the weekend, he called me and told me he is engaged to a woman undergoing preparations to get married soon. Obviously, that young lady is the 7th to be dated. The earlier exes all jilted him because he talks too much, leaks secrets and sensitive issues. He who talks too much is likely to have all his sensitive issues becoming a public issue.

  1. When the woman is not ready to submit

Anyone that cannot learn to submit to any man has no business entering into a marital relationship in the first place. No man wants to marry anyone that cannot submit to him, respect and listen to him. Women, you are destroying your own marriage if you cannot submit to any man. It will not work; that is why the Bible admonishes wives to submit to their husbands while husbands are to love their wives.

  1. Extreme Selfish interest over the other person

I have come across many people especially ladies who pass comments like, “He is just using me to satisfy his lust and desires”. If you date an extremely selfish person who is insensitive to your needs, plans and welfare in life, you will definitely feel like you are being used as an object for satisfaction instead of having that mutual respect and treatment you need.

  1. When exes are still in the picture

Once you have moved on in life with another person, know that your exes belong to your past and you must keep them away from influencing your decisions and your future with your current partner.

  1. Unforgiving and finding it difficult to say sorry

You can never live with someone till death do you part without some petty squabbles. Offences are inevitable in relationships and marriages. Deal with the offences as they come.

  1. Extreme selflessness and obvious.

Relationship is always about making sacrifices for each other to show your love and appreciate each other. When selflessness gets to the extreme, it might turn into obsession and this might send a negative signal to your partner. Just imagine an extreme selfless guy who wants to always give 100% of his salary to his girlfriend to please her. Your selflessness at this stage would be seen as a weakness instead of deeper love for your partner.

  1. Lack of regular communication

Anytime communication becomes absent, know that the marriage or the relationship is heading towards extinction. It will not exist again. The relationship or the marriage is dead. Communication is one of the best and surest ways to keep your relationship alive.

  1. When distance becomes a problem

Distance is always a problem when it comes to maintaining any relationship and marriage but where frequent communication, love and transparency exists, distance may not be a problem at all.

  1. Nagging and frequent complaints

This makes your partner coil back into his or her shells and asks whether you guys are really meant for each other. Secondly, you might be tempted to believe that you have seriously found yourself in the wrong relationship and you will wonder whether you were bewitched to have fallen for this person.

  1. Lack of trust and faithfulness

Faithfulness and trust move hand in hand. Anybody that is not faithful cannot be trusted. If you know you cannot marry someone, sit down with the person and take it over and let the person leave in peace instead of cheating.

  1. When you are ungrateful

Anytime you take the kindness, sacrifices, love and efforts of your partner for granted, you are being ungrateful. You must learn to appreciate and be grateful for everything your partner does for you whether little or the bigger ones.

  1. Failure  to apologize

Anytime you find yourself feeling too big and never ready to admit your wrongdoings, apologize and say sorry, then, know that you have an ego that is bigger than your relationship and marriage and it will soon crash.

  1. When all you want is sex, sex and more sex

Anytime you realize that all you want from your partner is sex, sex, more sex and a lot of sex then note that your relationship will soon break. Relationship and marriage is not all about sex and sex all the time.

  1. Leaving things messy

The habit of leaving things in a messy situation can destroy your relationship and your marriage. I once visited a couple. As I entered the sitting room, I was first greeted with the woman’s underwear, singlet and some towels left in the sofa. The man had to quickly push and pack some of the dirty clothes off the sofa before signaling me to sit down. It will surprise you to know that exhibiting messy habits in relationship may not lead to any good marriage.

  1. Addiction to bad habits

Whether alcohol, smoking, sex, being promiscuous or any other habit, addiction to any bad habit is detrimental to your relationship or marriage. Do not be a slave to any addiction; exercise self control over it if you really value your relationship or marriage.

  1. Over jealous and overprotective partner

Being overly jealous and overprotective without giving space to your partner could be very injurious to your relationship or marriage. In case of any issues of trust, sit down and talk about it and stop being overly jealous and overprotective. It will hurt both of you one day.

  1. When friendship and interactions are missing

Your partner is supposed to be your best friend, brother, sister and everything to you. If there is anyone that you always want to hang around with, then that should be your partner. If there is anyone that you enjoy the person’s company more than that of your partner, then, note that you are destroying the bond of friendship that should exist between you.

  1. That deadly secret and skeleton in your cupboard

If there is anything that you are still doing secretly behind your partner then note that, that particular thing has the potential of destroying your relationship and marriage. You must learn to tell your partner any secret which may crop up tomorrow and destroy your trust.

In conclusion, check your habits and some of the things that may destroy your relationship and marriage. Some unconscious personal habits could be a threat to a happy relationship and marriage.

2 Timely Articles For You:
a. 30 Annoying & Insulting Questions You Should Stop Asking Singles

b. 15 Reasons You Should Not Marry A Pretender


13 Reasons To Quit Fake Love & Pretending Relationships

Dear Singles & Married,

I welcome you all to the month of February, the month of Love. One of the most disturbing things about matters of the heart is fake love and pretending in relationships.

When it comes to matters of the heart, it is not something that one should toy with and take it lightly. While many people’s life have been transformed for the better because of relationships and marriage, a lot more are badly wounded and living with bleeding hearts and deadly emotional scars.

If you do not love someone anymore, let them go. For it is better to break a relationship than marriage. Do not deceive that person knowing very well that you are not genuinely in love and you can’t marry that person and live with him or her.

Living in pretence in relationships has the following disadvantages. I would want to share the 13 reasons to quit any fake love and pretending relationships you find yourself with you.

  1. It makes you a hypocrite
  2. You’re never of yourself
  3. You don’t have hope for the future
  4. You live in lies, fake love relationship and falsehood, playing hide and seek games
  5. Your conscience is always arresting and condemning you
  6. You don’t find true happiness in love
  7. Your heart is always yearning & searching to be attached to the right person
  8. You easily cheat on your unloved partner
  9. You are never pleased with anything the person does.
  10. You don’t care about that person
  11. You are just wasting each other’s time
  12. The worst form of depression is to force yourself to live with someone you don’t love and cannot trust.
  13. You may find it very difficult to plan for the future since you do not see yourself in his or her future.

If you find yourself in a pretending or faking relationship where you know you can never marry your partner, sit down and talk about it and let the person go in peace.

If you are already married and find yourself in similar situations, pray for God’s grace and seek professional counseling where possible.

I wish you well in your relationships and marriages. True love really exist (1 Cor.13)

Kindly share these 13 reasons to quit fake love and pretending relationships with friends and loved ones and share your views by commenting in the box provided.


Stop Dreaming About Your Marriage & Start Working On It

Dear singles, there is no love in marriage, no happiness, no care, no pleasure and no bond of friendship. If there’s anything like true love, then note that 2 people make up their minds to put it there. If there are care, happiness, memorable pleasure and a unique bond of friendship, then note that people made efforts to put them there. Stop dreaming about your marriage and start working on it!

Your investment in your marriage determines the possible returns you will get. If you sow lies, deception, laziness, unfaithfulness, immoral acts, bad character and little compromises to sin, then note that you have already given the devil the license to have a hand in your marriage. If the foundation is destroyed, what can the righteous do? (Psalm 11:3). Marriage is work so if the foundation is destroyed, what can the righteous do?

How you desire to have your marriage determines the kind of effort to make.

Ladies, don’t JUST say “I want to marry a God-fearing, loving and caring man who’s well established”. That’s good anyway but ask yourself whether you also possess those qualities. Remember, you’ll always attract your kind of partner in life.

Marriage is like tasty Jollof, how you want it determines the ingredients you will need but Skill and wisdom must be applied.

Remember that those skills are not in marriage, they are acquired.

Dear Single Ladies, your waiting singlehood time for your groom is also a learning and preparation time but not freedom to mess around.

Don’t be a foolish virgin without extra oil. Your extra oil refers to your added values, good character and skills learned.

Be conscious and deliberate about developing and keeping yourself.

To most men, your physical appearance catches their attention first but your character catches their heart to see you as marriage material.

Sadly, many ladies only invest in their looks neglecting their spirituality, morality, profession and other equally good areas. Live a balanced life.

Listen to me, whatever good thing you desire to have in your marriage is possible but remember that people have to be responsible enough to work towards it. Stop dreaming and start working on it


15 Reasons Not To Marry A Pretender

  • Over the years, I have received many calls and handled many situations of singles who were dating people who were pretending in a relationship. Someway somehow, most of them spotted the red flags but they decided to hold on a bit longer hoping that the other party will change but things never got better. The aftermath thereof is a brokenhearted, disappointed, abused and a used person who may be full of bitterness and finding it difficult to forgive and move on in life.

17 Reasons To Ban Amorous Pre-wedding Photoshoots

Weddings are one of the most solemn and sacred events in anyone’s life that are meant to usher the two would-be couple into the next stage of life called marriage. Marriage is a sacred event cherished by God Himself because it is the oldest institution established by God. Creation began with marriage in the Garden of Eden and the world will come to an end with the Marriage Feast of the Lamb in Heaven. This shows how important the institution of marriage is to the Almighty God that established marriage between a man and a woman.

Even though culture and tradition play a great role in the manner in which marriages should be contracted, recent developments called pre-wedding photoshoots meant to announce the scheduled date for marriage has rather taken a new and an amorous dimension. Inasmuch as one has to be creative when planning his or her wedding events, pre-wedding photoshoots taken these days really leave much to be desired.

In fact, many churches and individuals have raised eyebrows calling for the ban on amorous pre-wedding photoshoots. In this article, I have outlined the 17 reasons to ban amorous pre-wedding photoshoots. When done reading, kindly share your views and experiences with us.

17 Reasons To Ban Amorous Pre-wedding Photoshoots

  1. It exposes both would-be couples to both spiritual and physical attacks.
  1. Indecent exposure of your body is evil and a sin
  1. You are not married to be touching each other in a sensual way
  1. It promotes lust and fornication among both the youth and adults
  1. It takes away the sacred and godly aspect of marriage
  1. It is a tool used by the devil to shift attention from God and destroy people through amorous acts. Most of those couples have had sex several times before marriage
  1. It doesn’t add any value to the actual marriage
  1. Pre-wedding photoshoots are just sometimes a waste of time
  1. Amorous pre-wedding photoshoots are just extra cost to the couple even if it’s part of the package from the media house contracted to take videos and pictures
  1. It brings unhealthy and unnecessary competition for more amorous pictures among would-be couples
  1. People turn to expect too much from your amorous pictures
  1. It creates a negative perception of the would-be couples are ‘spoilt partners’
  1. A good marriage is a work but not amorous pictures.
  1. You are only adding to your stress before marriage
  1. You may regret tomorrow for taking some amorous pictures today. You no idea where those pictures could land you tomorrow.
  1. The internet won’t forgive you for posting those pictures on social media, it stays there for eternity and fighting for its removal could be a lifelong battle.
  1. It totally defeats your Christians values if you are a Christian

Trending Article: 10 Reasons Pre-Wedding Photoshoots Aren’t So Important


When The Devil Has Time For Your Wife

To all the married and single men in a relationship, when the devil had time for Eve and started chatting and whatsapping her, humanity has suffered till now. Sometimes, you have to be mindful of the one who is always talking to your partner. Adam, the World’s No.1 busiest CEO, lose his glory as a man when the devil had time for his wife. Men, your busyness will amount to nothing if your family is destroyed. Have time for your wife and family at times. They need you and not always your money or material things.

One of the best gifts any man can give to his wife or woman is not lots of money and the most expensive and luxurious gifts ever; it is the quality of your time you spend with her that matters. Many women have all they wanted in this world from their husbands but they are still living as singles and no one to talk to them.

It is important to note that, a little time the devil spent with Adam’s wife led to the worst disaster that hit humanity in the history of the world. Husbands! Men! It is good to have the promotions, the international appointments, the juicy packages and all that comes with them but remember, you only have a beautiful house but not a home.

The Bible says in Prov. 16:27-29 that an idle hand is the devil’s workshop. In same manner, an idle wife could be a chat mate of the devil if your wife avails herself and yields to someone to keep her company to kill her loneliness and boredom. Most of the women that cheat on their husbands emanates from absentee husbands who is always not around to satisfy their wives.

After God created everything in the world, He realized the community of man was lacking people. God created man to live in a community but not on an island all alone by himself. After observing all the animals and fishes in the sea and the birds in the skies all living in a community, God declared that it was not good for man to live alone.

Husbands, it is not good to always leave your wife at home and be somewhere else always chasing money. It is not good to travel and leave your wife for years before returning. It is not all women that are that disciplined and committed to stay faithful and wait for you to return.

Remember, When the devil had time for Adam’s wife, his lost his authority, fell short of the glory of God (Rom. 3:23) and was translated from immortality to mortality. You didn’t marry your wife for your house, TV, house help or be the security guard watching your house but to be your companion, keeping you company.

When the devil has time for your wife, it’s all about disaster. You don’t need to fast and pray and break the devil. Have time for your wife to occupy the vacuum that your absence has created. Period!

Before you go, enjoy these amazing pieces:

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10 Reasons Pre-Wedding Photoshoots Aren’t So Important

Weddings are a solemn event that ushers two would-be lovers into marriage. It is a time of preparation in all angles including spiritual matters which should not be taken on a lighter note. Over the years, pre-wedding photoshoots have become the order of the day as others go viral due to glamour, style or something peculiar about the would-be couples.

In most of these photoshoots, photographers are normally interested in capturing incredibly creative moments of the couples depicting their emotions, passion and intimacy. The question is who cares to know the emotions, the passion and the kind of intimacy that exists in your marriage? Despite the arguments in favour of pre-wedding photoshoots, here are some reasons why singles have to forget and avoid it. They are not so important. When done reading, kindly share your views with us by commenting.

10 Reasons Pre-Wedding Photoshoots Aren’t So Important

  1. Extra cost

I have come across several pre-wedding photoshoots where the happy would-be couples wear different designer wears or customized dresses and sometimes with the same footwear. All these add up to the huge cost to make marriage very expensive. It is not a matter of having the money to foot all those bills. In fact, that money can be used for something more important.

  1. Waste of time

Pre-wedding photoshoots can be time wasting where the would-be couples have to travel to either near or far places to take pictures that depict the kind of message they want to send around to all friends and loved ones about their big day. The time spent on pre-wedding photoshoots could be used for something more important.

  1. It creates unnecessary competition

One of the serious things about pre-wedding photoshoots is the unnecessary competition to outdo or outperform one another. Some would-be couples even pay some event organizers to think of some creative and wonderful styles that could go viral to add more fun to the event. All these are not necessary. Whom are you competing with in your marital journey?

  1. Exposes couples to spiritual and physical attacks

Do you know that taking wonderful and glamorous pictures of your pre-wedding events could send signals to your enemies that you guys are now better off in life? Physically, you could be a prime target of armed robbers and thieves. Before you wonder why armed robbers do rob some freshly married couples and rape the bride as well, pause and check whether you are thinking of doing something that will attract them. Spiritually, your marriage could be attacked. Do not expose yourselves too much to the world. Not all those who hit the like button and comment on your pictures wish you well in life.

  1. People expect so much from highly publicized marriages

My dear singles, many people will expect so much from your highly publicized wedding and eventually put pressure on your marriage. Marriage comes with a lot of challenges. The least challenge you may encounter could be a newspaper headline. Marriage is a solemn and a holy institution, if possible, keep it away from detractors and intruders.

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11 Bad Perceptions People Have About Singles Whose Marriage Delay

Do you know the troubles and the perceptions people have about singles simply because your marriage has delayed? Sometimes, the single ladies, especially, hide in their rooms, weep and lament and wonder when they will be hooked up and wedded. One of the things people forget is that, meeting the right partner and getting married is not just like going to the mall and picking items on the shelves and bingo, that is it.

There could be several factors leading to late marriage. When done reading, kindly share your views and experience with us.

11 Bad Perceptions People Have About Singles Whose Marriage Delay

  1. You have too high standards and still searching for such unattainable standards

It is not every man or woman that is still single because of preference for high standards of the caliber of man or woman one wants to marry. It is wrong for people to have such thoughts and start calling singles whose marriages have delayed with all kinds of names. The best thing you should do is to pray for such singles and if possible, get closer to them and assist them in any way possible instead of badmouthing them.

  1. You may have a spiritual husband or wife

One of the serious perceptions people have about you when your marriage delays is that you may have a spiritual husband or wife that is preventing men or women from coming near you. Though this could be true in some cases, it is not all delayed marriages that are caused by spiritual husbands and wives. Discard such perceptions.

  1. You are under a curse

In some churches, most of their all night services and breakthrough prayers are normally filled with singles who in one way or the other have been told that a spell has been cast on them and that is preventing them from marrying. Some pastors do organize special curse breaking programs for singles whose marriages are delayed but could this always be the case? It could be one of those negative perceptions which have no bearing on the realities on the ground.

  1. You are immoral and you enjoy illicit affairs with many partners

I have come across many people who believe and have the wrong perceptions that singles whose marriages have delayed may be immoral and may be hopping from one partner to another for money, sexual pleasure and other material things. This perception is very bad. There are many singles who are more righteous and holier than many married adults and are determined not to mess up. It is important to note that not all singles or unmarried young adults are into immoral activities with many sexual partners.

  1. You do not have money to prepare and marry

It is so annoying when people keep asking: haven’t you made enough money to get settled down with a man or woman? At other times, you may hear questions like: you can’t get all the money and everything in the world before you marry so decide now. It is important to know that not all young adults are still single because of not having enough money to marry. Some are very rich and yet, still remained single for one reason or the other.

  1. Your bad character wards off potential suitors

In our part of the world, it seems it is a serious crime for a beautiful lady to remain single without any responsible man in her life and this becomes worse when such a person’s marriage delays. Many people have the notion that if a beautiful woman remains single, then it could be due to her bad character and immoral behaviours that ward off potential suitors. Technically, some young people may decide to become celibates so one should kindly respect their choices in life. It is not everyone that is supposed to marry.

  1. You are not a real man or woman

For the men, people think that a real man is the one who makes his wife sweats profusely in bed but not her eyes and once you are not getting married, they may believe that you are impotent or have a critical medical condition that scares you from marriage. And for the women too, people might think you might have lived an immoral life and committed several abortions which may have damaged your womb, hence cannot support any seed in your womb so you decide to stay away from marriage.

  1. You have suffered from bad relationships and scared of another

It is very funny to know how people think of all forms of bad things about you when they are not getting the right answers to their doubts and questions. Sometimes, people may largely attribute your late marriage to bad relationships and marriages which are scaring you from entering into another. Though this could be a major factor for some people, this may not be applicable to all people.

  1. You are saving and planning for expensive marriage

It is not true that every single man or woman wants an extravagant wedding? That is a total deception. There are many millionaires who opted for court weddings and invited only a few friends. Others also opted for low budget weddings. It is not all singles whose marriages have delayed desire to have expensive weddings.

  1. Your education and high ambitions are delaying your marriage

Sometimes, people may think that your delayed marriage could be attributed to your desire to climb higher, the academic ladder, establish your dream business or build your house first.

  1. Still Waiting For The Perfect Partner Who Doesn’t Exist

One of the funny perceptions people have about singles whose marriages are delayed is that you are still waiting for that perfect person who does not necessarily exist but only exist in your mind.

Did I miss anything about the negative perceptions people have about singles whose marriage delay? Kindly share your experience with us.




2 Pre-Wedding Photoshoots People Are Still Talking About

Over the past few years, people have become creative in their pre-wedding photoshoots to announcement the solemnization of their holy matrimony. Though creativity is key and has become the order of the day, some of these photos which have gone viral, leave much to be desired.

Recently, one of the team members of came across these two pre-wedding photoshoots and we too cannot stop talking about it and we will love to share our thoughts on these with you.

Let’s talk about these 2 Pre-Wedding Photoshoots People Are Still Talking About.

  1. The Adam & Eve Couple


Marriage is unique and sweet when you meet the right person to share your love, the rest of your life and live with that person. The first ever marriage took place in the Garden of Eden between Adam and Eve. These days, many people try to take pre-wedding photoshoot to depict the original love that brewed in the life of the first ever couple. That is an awesome idea.

What is more disturbing about these picture was the apple the supposed Eve gave to Adam that led to the downfall of man. Does it mean that the woman has already given any forbidden fruit to Adam to eat and fall already before entering the marriage or she will definitely give him a poisonous apple one day? Just asking oooo without any dirty mind here?

Though the picture came under heavy criticism from people all over on social media, doing away with the apple would have been a bit okay.

Mr. Adam and Mrs. Eve, we wish you guys well in your marriage but Eve, please make sure you will not eat any poisonous apple and give some to your husband.

  1. The Mrs. & Mrs. Lotto Operator

Eeeiii, Mr. and Mrs. Lotto Operator. The picture was creative though but many eyebrows were raised on the choice of a lotto kiosk being used.

Why are people condemning these two would-be couple? Well, people generally know that lotto is a game, a form of gambling and something full of uncertainties. Lotto is a win or lose venture and one wonders why the would-be couple’s pre-wedding photoshoot should be done in such a setup.

Anyway, we wish them well in their marriage.

What did you say about these two pictures when you first came across them?

Share your views with us.




15 Negative Perceptions People Have About Marrying A Beautiful Woman

Last week, I got a call from a friend who was frustrated about the perception of his parents, some friends and loved ones about the woman he wants to marry and spend the rest of his life with. He introduced the lady to his people and they seemed worried, not that they knew her with any bad character or bad records but for the mere fact that she is too beautiful.

The family, friends and loved ones of my friend, say Fred, had their own perceptions and negative tags about extremely beautiful women. After offering some pieces of advice to my friend to move on with the lady he has dated for two years without any bad records or character, thoughts about some negative tags people label beautiful women began flash on my mind. In this article, I want to share the 15 negative perceptions and tags people have about marrying pretty women.

15 Negative Perceptions People Have About Marrying A Beautiful Woman

  1. They are spoilt, bad girls and prostitutes.
  2. Extremely beautiful women are spirits and mermaids.
  3. They are too expensive to live with. You can’t even afford the cost of their perfumes.
  4. You have to be fighting other men who want to have their way with your woman.
  5. They do not respect and their character is bad.
  6. They are unfaithful. They cannot stay with one partner
  7. They are materialistic and always seeking flashing things to show their beauty.
  8. They are lazy – they do not like working but depend on men for income.
  9. Most of them are beautiful but without brains.
  10. They will leave you when you are broke.
  11. You are insecure and jealousy may kill you.
  12. You marry a pretty woman – you marry a problem.
  13. Beautiful women mostly control their husbands because of their beauty and bodily assets.
  14. Their biggest assets is their body but not their brains.
  15. People believe every rich and beautiful woman got her wealth through sex.

My Advice To All

It is not a curse or a bad thing to be created as a beautiful woman. It is also not a bad thing to marry a beautiful woman. You are not disadvantaged too if you are not that pretty. Beauty is subjective. Beauty without character is vain glory. The Bible said you are fearfully and wonderfully made by God (Psalm 139:14). Not all beautiful women are bad and not all ugly women are also good or bad. It all depends on the character of the person. It is character that one should look out for to marry but not the beauty of a person.

Remember, a beautiful woman without character is a beautiful burden to the husband.

Did I miss anything that I did not talk about regarding the negative perceptions people have about marrying pretty women? What do you think about this topic? Have you ever had any negative experiences in this regard? Share your thoughts and experience with us.

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